It has been so long since I posted that I forgot my blog password. (Although these days my pregnancy brain is very forgetful, so maybe it is not surprising?)
I am just so....pregnant. (36 weeks!) With lots of contractions. Which leads to lots of water drinking and laying on my left side and waiting for the contractions to go away. (It's a little too early baby to make an appearance!) My motivation to get things done has skyrocketed. Unfortunately my body has not got the memo. So I am left in limbo.
At least for today. Tomorrow I will probably feel totally different. (Thanks, hormones, for this lovely roller coaster ride.)
My thoughts are cloudy and my body is STRETCHED and my heart is full and my feet are swollen, but my mind is too. I can hardly sleep...too many to do list thoughts, and what if thoughts, and plan b thoughts. And I AM HAVING A FOURTH CHILD thoughts.
A FOURTH CHILD. (Who I am ecstatic to meet. But also? A little scared!) Tell me again why I thought I could handle four children?
The truth is I'm hoping I can. And I DO think I can. I just knew when I was preggo with Violet that we weren't done yet. I told Travis it will probably take me three months to be ok at having four kids and hopefully in six months I will be good at it. (Good being a relative term, of course.)
Travis is a pro with our girls and I am more than anxious to see him navigate a little boy. I don't know much about baby boys!
The bottom line is I have been pretty miserable the last few weeks. But in the end I will get to have our baby, and it will be worth every moment of discomfort.
I think I am giving myself an online pep talk. That is totally normal, right?